DON'T HOPE,...DECIDE!
by Michael D. Hargrove
While waiting to pick up a friend at the airport in Portland, Oregon,
I had one of those life-changing experiences that you hear other
people talk about -- the kind that sneaks up on you unexpectedly. This
one occurred a mere two feet away from me.
Straining to locate my friend among the passengers deplaning through
the jet way, I noticed a man coming toward me carrying two light bags.
He stopped right next to me to greet his family.
First he motioned to his youngest son (maybe six years old) as he laid
down his bags. They gave each other a long, loving hug. As they
separated enough to look in each other's face, I heard the father say,
"It's so good to see you, son. I missed you so much!" His son smiled
somewhat shyly, averted his eyes and replied softly, "Me, too, Dad!"
Then the man stood up, gazed in the eyes of his oldest son (maybe nine
or ten) and while cupping his son's face in his hands said, "You're
already quite the young man. I love you very much, Zach!" They too
hugged a most loving, tender hug.
While this was happening, a baby girl (perhaps one or one-and-a-half)
was squirming excitedly in her mother's arms, never once taking her
little eyes off the wonderful sight of her returning father. The man
said, "Hi, baby girl!" as he gently took the child from her mother. He
quickly kissed her face all over and then held her close to his chest
while rocking her from side to side. The little girl instantly relaxed
and simply laid her head on his shoulder, motionless in pure
contentment.
After several moments, he handed his daughter to his oldest son and
declared, "I've saved the best for last!" and proceeded to give his
wife the longest, most passionate kiss I ever remember seeing. He
gazed into her eyes for several seconds and then silently mouthed. "I
love you so much!" They stared at each other's eyes, beaming big
smiles at one another, while holding both hands.
For an instant they reminded me of newlyweds, but I knew by the age of
their kids that they couldn't possibly be. I puzzled about it for a
moment then realized how totally engrossed I was in the wonderful
display of unconditional love not more than an arm's length away from
me. I suddenly felt uncomfortable, as if I was invading something
sacred, but was amazed to hear my own voice nervously ask, "Wow!
How long have you two been married?
"Been together fourteen years total, married twelve of those." he
replied, without breaking his gaze from his lovely wife's face.
"Well then, how long have you been away?" I asked. The man finally
turned and looked at me, still beaming his joyous smile. "Two whole
days!"
Two days? I was stunned. By the intensity of the greeting, I had
assumed he'd been gone for at least several weeks - if not months. I
know my expression betrayed me.
I said almost offhandedly, hoping to end my intrusion with some
semblance of grace (and to get back to searching for my friend), "I
hope my marriage is still that passionate after twelve years!"
The man suddenly stopped smiling.
He looked me straight in the eye, and with forcefulness that burned
right into my soul, he told me something that left me a different
person. He told me, "Don't hope, friend... decide!" Then he flashed
me his wonderful smile again, shook my hand and said, "God bless!"
With that, he and his family turned and strode away together. I was
still watching that exceptional man and his special family walk just
out of sight when my friend came up to me and asked, "What'cha looking
at?"
Without hesitating, and with a curious sense of certainty, I
replied, "My future!"
Copyright 1997 by Michael D. Hargrove and Bottom Line Underwriters, Inc. All rights reserved. Used with permission.
You never really lose your Value!
A well known speaker started off his seminar by holding up a $20 bill. In
the room of 200, he asked, "What is this piece of paper & is it worth any
thing ?"
"It is a $20 bill, encashable in international & national markets for it's
quoted value ?" replied one of the many participants who raised their
hands.
He proceeded to crumple the dollar bill up using both his hands till it
became a bundle of wrinkled paper.
He then unfolded it again and making an unsuccessful attempt to keep it
straight he asked, "Would you still be able to negotiate it for it's
quoted value?"
" Yes !!" was the echoing reply from the participants.
"Well," he said, "Looks like I haven't done enough ! What if I do this?"
And he dropped it on the ground and started to grind it into the floor
with his shoe. He picked it up, which was now all crumpled, dirty, defaced
& not easy to recognise from a distance.
"Now will some one like to trade it for its quoted value?" Many hands went
in the air.
"I think this piece of currency is still holding its quoted value" replied
a participant in a slightly unsure voice.
"This bill can still fetch goods worth 20 Dollars"
said the other participants. Every one agreed.
"My friends, there is a very valuable lesson in this exercise that we are
just through with. It may have appeared to some of you, that I was able to
deshape, deface, mutilate & alter the $20 bill during the process as the
effects were quite visible".
"However, No matter what I did to this piece of paper, you still upheld
its negotiability because you were sure in your mind that my actions did
not actually decrease its value. It was still a currency note worth $20".
"Many times in our lives, we feel like as if we are dropped, crumpled, and
ground into the dirt by the decisions we make and/or the circumstances
that come our way. We feel as though we are worthless. It may also appear
to onlookers as if it has really happened to certain extent. But no matter
what has happened or what will happen, please remember you never lose your
"Value"."
Values that you cherish are indeed devoid of worldly disturbance & always
are your saviour.
–Author Unknown
Your Actions Mean more than you Know
One day, when I was a freshman in high school, I saw a kid from my class
was walking home from school. His name was Kyle. It looked like he was
carrying all of his books. I thought to myself, "Why would anyone bring
home all his books on a Friday? He must really be a nerd." I had quite a
weekend planned (parties and a football game with my friends tomorrow
afternoon), so I shrugged my shoulders and went on. As I was walking, I
saw a bunch of kids running toward him. They ran at him, knocking all his
books out of his arms and tripping him so he landed in the dirt.
His glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten
feet from him. He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes.
My heart went out to him. So, I jogged over to him and as he crawled
around looking for his glasses, and I saw a tear in his eye. As I handed
him his glasses, I said, "Those guys are jerks. They really should get
lives." He looked at me and said, "Hey thanks!"
There was a big smile on his face. It was one of those smiles that
showed real gratitude. I helped him pick up his books, and asked him
where he lived. As it turned out, he lived near me, so I asked him why I
had never seen him before. He said he had gone to private school before
now. I would have never hung out with a private school kid before. We
talked all the way home, and I carried his books. He turned out to be a
pretty cool kid. I asked him if he wanted to play football on Saturday
with me and my friends. He said yes. We hung all weekend and the more I
got to know Kyle, the more I liked him. And my friends thought the same
of him.
Monday morning came, and there was Kyle with the huge stack of books
again. I stopped him and said, "Damn boy, you are gonna really build some
serious muscles with this pile of books everyday!" He just laughed and
handed me half the books.
Over the next four years, Kyle and I became best friends. When we were
seniors, began to think about college. Kyle decided on Georgetown, and I
was going to Duke. I knew that we would always be friends, that the miles
would never be a problem. He was going to be a doctor, and I was going for
business on a football scholarship.
Kyle was valedictorian of our class.
I teased him all the time about being a nerd. He had to prepare a speech
for graduation. I was so glad it wasn't me having to get up there and
speak. Graduation day, I saw Kyle. He looked great. He was one of those
guys that really found himself during high school. He filled out and
actually looked good in glasses. He had more dates than me and all the
girls loved him! Boy, sometimes I was jealous.
Today was one of those days. I could see that he was nervous about his
speech. So, I smacked him on the back and said, "Hey, big guy, you'll be
great!" He looked at me with one of those looks (the really grateful one)
and smiled. "Thanks," he said. As he started his speech, he cleared his
throat, and began. "Graduation is a time to thank those who helped you
make it through those tough years. Your parents, your teachers, your
siblings, maybe a coach... but mostly your friends. I am here to tell all
of you that being a friend to someone is the best gift you can give them.
I am going to tell you a story." I just looked at my friend with disbelief
as he told the story of the first day we met. He had planned to kill
himself
over the weekend. He talked of how he had cleaned out his locker so his
Mom wouldn't have to do it later and was carrying his stuff home. He
looked hard at me and gave me a little smile. "Thankfully, I was saved. My
friend saved me from doing the unspeakable." I heard the gasp go through
the crowd as this handsome, popular boy told us all about his weakest
moment.I saw his Mom and dad looking at me and smiling that same grateful
smile. Not until that moment did I realize it's depth.
Never underestimate the power of your actions. With one small gesture
you can change a person's life. For better or for worse.
- Author Unknown
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